Bookmarked

Old chapters are coming to an end.  Maybe a slightly premature end, maybe I won't know that until the next chapter begins.  But the one thing I am certain of, is that time runs away with you, however much you try to slow it down.  You can tie a ball and chain to the ankles of time and they still manage to sprint on, whisking you off your feet in the process.

Mission Live Life. Life style change is one thing I am determined to implement again and again.  Years of conditioning may be deep - we have a need to do everything, want more, think money, work work work.  Sometimes I feel like I have dug myself out of those groves over and over. Like a mountain bike track - you can see those tire marks from the many bikes that have ridden that path before you.  You are following those tire marks, but every now and then you break free.  Create your own tire marks and it feels good.  It's fresh and free.  But before you know it, you have slipped into auto pilot and you are back in those well warn tracks again.

When I first arrived in Hanmer Springs I was determined to stay off those old bike tracks.  Money was needed, yes, but lifestyle was going to be priority.  I got 2 jobs but made it clear to both employees what I wanted in way of hours.  Full time at the housekeeping job at Settlers Motel (9.30 - 2.00 5/6 days a week) Perfect!  And 3 nights waitressing @ Saints.  at first, due to school holidays I was full time at Saints and less work at Settlers until Emmy Lou and Dave left.  As Settlers became more full time, the holidays would be over and my few nights a week would come into place.  I had it all worked out.  I would do yoga and run in my spare time and all would be good.  But it doesn't always work like that and without realising I was full time at both and very tired.  Once the holidays were over things settled down and soon I was forming my own tire tracks again and things were perfect.  I was literally doing yoga every morning, working until 2pm, running or walking in the afternoons or baking and cooking which was a new found hobby.  This was life!  Still saving, paying the only 2 bills I had (rent and mobile) and absorbing everything Hanmer Springs had to offer like the biggest sponge you've ever seen.


The street where I live

 Autumn had, without a doubt , arrived and the trees and mountains were incredible shades of red and orange.  Hanmer Forest was so colourful that I felt like I inhaled it's happiness as I walked to and from work every day.  I spent my half an hour walk each way looking all around me, eyes wide like a learning baby, face aching with a big fat grin.  The sun still shone and soon a few mountains had sparkling white peaks.  I was happy.  Really happy.  And for the right reasons.  I wasn't getting cheap highs as a result of a binging social life, male attention massaging my ego or traveling from place to place feeding my adventurer habit.  I was loving the life I had created.

Unfortunately, the boat was soon rocked, a few extra shits here and there, disrupting my routine (Having a routine seems to be the only way I muster up the motivation to keep exercising).  I then lost my job at Saints and things were good again.  Spin class once a week, mountain biking with my boss from settlers, a sport i thought I was too wimpy for, but is my new drug.  Top bike, top biking buddy and adrenaline/endorphin heaven!!!  (or dolphin heaven as a friend used to say)

View From Conical Hill

Life was amazing.  Afternoons walking up conical hill with views of the whole town and mountains in all directions.  I had freedom.  In the evenings, without the hectic, understaffed, under paid restaurant job, I would watch TV, do more yoga, cook or read books.  I was like a pig in shit.  A couple of times I did have a slight pang of loneliness.  I didn't want to go out and spend money or party but having another presence in the room while I silently read or watched a movie would have been nice.  Occasionally my house mate Siobhan would have a night off from her pub job and we'd cook together or go for a meal which was lovely.  An excuse to get dressed up sometimes.  I went out a couple of times with a guy I met after work one night but soon realised that I valued my own time more than that shared with him.



Kieran came to visit us on his surf trip

 Hanmer continued to be amazing and beautiful even after the cheerful colours of autumn had blown away.  We had visitors which included trips to the hot pools, road trips to the sea and discovering more of Hanmer with the use of an automobile. 

Things then changed again.  I wouldn't say that I began to bike in the old warn grooves of the bike tracks, more that I took a new route.  A loop track that I knew would return me to the track that I wanted to be on eventually.

Mr Biggles

Sally, my boss at Settlers had to go away for a while as her brother became very sick.  They were told there was nothing that could be done for him so Sally would be at his bedside until the very sad day that she wold have to say goodbye.  Alan, her husband was to and from for support and while they were both away, I would mind the motel for them.  I had said from the start that I would do anything I possibly could to help them and I meant it.  Seeing Sally so upset was heart breaking and being in a situation where I had no other commitments was perfect.  I had a crash course on managing the 5* motel and soon moved in upstairs.  I wold stat work at 7am and finally locked the last door (the laundry room) at 9pm.  The phone would still ring up to about 10pm sometimes and as part of my role I was looking after the house too which included the 3 burman cats.  It was full on but I loved it.  A different kind of buzz and adrenaline, although a little stressful with the responsibility.  And I had my fair share of dramas - no hot water, power cuts, broken heat pumps (which turned out to be user error but the customer is always right of course).

I would manage the place for a week and then get my life back when Alan returned, but sleeping patterns now disrupted, getting up for yoga was over, afternoon runs were on hold and things were slowly slipping through my fingers.  Of course I also got my own bad news from home and spent a week with a head like jelly and the weight of the world on my shoulders.  My present and future was uncertain and the right answer was camouflaged like Where's Wally.  Thank you to Siobhan during that time for her patience and my Kinder Surprise.  After days of waking up and only being able to think about what a mess my head felt, after asking advice, pros and cons, lists and angel cards I woke, BANG!  3am, bolt upright in bed.  The answer was as clear as the Settlers Motel glass windows (top cleaners).  And life, once again was semi-normal, although still minding Settlers now and then.  Ian, Sally's brother sadly passed away and she was back with us being strong Aunt Sally again.  She was missed and while dealing with Ian's illness, her frail parents moved out of their home following another big earthquake, they had no water or electricity in the house that Ian was living in.  They then cleaned and packed and rented out her parents house, house hunted, bought and moved in her parents into a new one whilst dealing with every one's emotions and being a rock for them all.  She was incredible and things are finally feeling normal again. 

Simone Heading down the slopes

Salmon fishing in Golden Bay

My free time is back and last week I skied and rock climbed on my day off, back to spin class and doing yoga again.  I have just had an amazing week off work too and hitched up to the Nelson region to explore golden bay.  I hired a bike and biked for miles to the sea, went for coffee with friends, went fishing and ate fresh Salmon every day.  I stayed with some amazing people and we ate together and sat around the log fire in the evenings.  It was like therapy and with the sun shining down hard I feel fully rested and content.  I am heading back to Hanmer Springs tomorrow and snow is on the way again.  Questions still unanswered about this chapter closing permanently or simply being bookmarked, the next chapter will begin for me soon and it is time on e again to sit back on the rollercoaster of fate, buckle up and enjoy the ride.

What an amazing place Hamner Springs and an inspiring country New Zealand.  Does out relationship end here?

My next adventure will be incredible with 2 1/2 weeks in Malaysia visiting Lee and a month in an Indian Ashram before returning home for my first family Christmas and first UK Christmas in 5 years.  I better buckle up good for this ride!